Where to find a reason to laugh today: Rule number 1, no clowns... well, maybe just the one below.

 

Editor's precede for perspective: In these somber pandemic and political unrest days, it is hard to find a reason to laugh, and the media pushes it all right in our faces. But thankfully, these are not 'forever days' and the soul must laugh or die a thousand deaths. So keep looking and finding cause. Your life depends on it.

"Laughter is the closest distance between two people." Victor Borge

Ever walk down the street with a smile and nod to the stranger(s) walking toward you? Most smile back... not counting the few who think you are an idiot. However, this is absolutely guaranteed to give at least one person--you--a lighter step. And you can be sure it affects a few more than that.

A lighter heart is a free, non-toxic, over-the-counter drug that is good for almost anything that may ail you. The welcome side-effect is that it is infectious.

Here are a few tips to bring a smile and more to your psyche so you can be on your way to a better day.

'The human race has only one effective weapon, and that is laughter." Mark Twain

Below are/were headlines of  real stories from newspapers (what are newspapers?) around the country. Typically, headlines are written, often at the last minute before deadline, by an editor who reads the story quickly then writes the headline to fit the space allotted. The headline capsules the story in just a few words to pique the reader's interest. And some goofy headlines--I personally know this--were written purposely, to elicit a smile and not get fired:

• Include your children when baking cookies
• Something went wrong in jet crash, experts say
• police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
• Drunks get nine months in violin case
• Iraqi head seeks arms
• Is there a ring of debris around Uranus? (personal favorite)
• Would-be women priests appeal to pope
  
• Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over
• Teacher strikes idle kids
• Clinton wins budget; more lies ahead
• Plane too close to ground, crash probe told
• Miners refuse to work after death
• Juvenile court to try shooting defendant
• Stolen painting found by tree
• Two sisters reunited after 18 years in checkout line
• War dims hope for peace
• If strike isn't settled quickly, it may last a while
• Couple slain; police suspect homicide
• Man struck by lightning faces battery charge
• New study of obesity looks for large test group
• Astronaut takes blame for gas in space
• Kids make nutritious snacks
• Local high school dropouts cut in half
• Typhoon rips through cemetery; hundreds dead

"Seven days without laughter makes one weak." Mort Walker

Then there is the old 'pie in the eye' thing, more popular years ago, that shows comedians Laurel and Hardy setting a world record you won't believe: more than 3,000 pies in the face! That always used to get a laugh, right up there with the banana peel on the sidewalk... today replaced with some home video of a trick going awry with some object smacking into a man's crotch on America's Funniest Videos. I guess today we just demand something more sophisticated. 

"Maturity is the bitter disappointment for which no remedy exists, unless laughter could be said to remedy anything." Kurt Vonnegut

Are we so somber today that monkeys have a richer sense of humor than we do? Primates don't just laugh, they crack jokes.

Koko, a famed gorilla who died a short while back at age 47, knew sign language and had a 2,000 word vocabulary. When she was asked, "what can you think of that's hard? She signed "rock" and "work." Another time, she tied her trainer's shoelaces together and signed "Chase." That's a true story. Ask Wikipedia.

Why do waiters like gorillas better than flies? Have you ever heard a customer complain "Waiter, there's a gorilla in my soup!"

"Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter." Friedrich Nietzsche

Obviously Nietzsche didn't know Koko, but his quote is mostly accurate. 

The greatest cause for laughter is when you look in the mirror. It is you. I remember the last time I changed the oil in my car. (Hint: it was also the first time.) I was cleaning and waxing my first car, a '54 Chevy coupe, and thought I'd save myself a few dollars and change the oil. All went incredibly well until I leaned over the front of the engine to pour the in new oil and noticed that my feet were starting to slip out from under me.

Seems like I missed step no. 3: Be sure to put the cap back onto the oil reservoir before refilling.

And that is the closest I ever came to car repair.

"Comedy is defiant. It's a snort of contempt in the face of fear and anxiety. And it's the laughter that allows hope to creep back on the inhale." Will Durst

Chuckles the Clown of the old Mary Tyler Moore show was eulogized at his death by Mary who remembered his favorite line: "A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer in your pants." It is the epitome of how laughter and crying are spun from the same emotion. You can decide here if it makes you smile or cry. Or, I'm betting, laughing out loud.

"If you want to make others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion." Dalai Lama

I'm a Cubs fan (why are you laughing, I haven't got to the punch line yet) but I couldn't exclude this little story for a laugh: 

A Chicago first grade teacher admits to her class that she is a die-hard Cubs fan. She asks her class if they are Cub fans too. Most, perhaps not really knowing what being a Cub fan is but wanting to please their teacher, raise their hands. All, that is, except one young lady in the back row.

"Then what are you?" the teacher asks. 

"I'm a Chicago White Sox fan," the girl says.

The teacher, taken aback, because that's how Cub fans are, asks why she is a White Sox fan.

"My dad and mom are White Sox fans and I am too."

 "Well, if your mom was a moron and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?"

"Then," says the girl, "I'd be a Cub fan."

"Laughter is a gift from God which requires a different kind of thank you note." Me

How important is laughter? It's important enough that most television comedy sitcoms have laugh tracks. I thought this was demeaning to the viewer so I started to blog about that. It was then, I discovered, it really does have a place. And here's why

"Laughter is like a windshield wiper. It doesn't stop the rain but it allows us to keep going" Somebody smart.

True confession: I've been blogging for about 12 years now and have posted more than 800 times, so many that I sometimes actually forget what I've written. Some of this post is repurposed. To see all I've written about, check the links that run beside my blog and have a look. I often make myself laugh but how about you, out of sympathy perhaps. 

You ever feel like a fish out of water?

 

I sometimes feel like a fish out of water... and no, I didn't do that. Found this fish half-mile from closest water... and it made me think.

I feel sometime lost and am betting I'm not alone. The world that used to be wasn't always incredible, but it was pretty darn good. 

These pandemic months are now almost a year long, and while the light may show the end of the tunnel, we still have to make it that far. 

Sadly for many, the canary has already died.

The next surge-upon--surge upon--upon surge predictions are for 450,000-plus deaths with more to follow until we reach herd immunity in mid to late summer or even later. It still feels insane to think that some don't take this whole thing as a fact. One 'Letter to the Editor' guy even urged 'all true patriots' to throw down their masks and walk proudly anywhere they choose.

Well, as Joseph Stalin who ruled The Soviet Union for more that 30 years said, "One death is a tragedy. But one million deaths is a statistic." And he should know.

The New York Times in May of this year ran four full pages (1,000 names) of covid-19 victims along with a defining sentence on each individual, taken from their obituaries, to personalize that vitally important individual who once lived, loved and was loved, is more that a statistic. But we forget.

Imagine that if The NY Times ran the names of all the victims to date (about 350,000 and counting) it would need 1,400 pages... and counting. Really!

And while many still feel it is their inalienable right not wear masks nor practice social distancing, some do fall victims themselves. But most think they get away with it. Sadly, we do not know how many others subsequently become infected from them and yet they feel no responsibility. And now, the greater peril is at hand as a recent mutation has made that strain considerably more contagious.

"Bummer of a birthmark, Hal.
by Gary Larson

Here's what many of the most vulnerable of us--the older, those with compromising health conditions, the oft-trodden minorities and those living in poverty-- feel like.

We have an invisible target on our backs... and it's open season every day.

We will, as a world,  reach herd immunity we believe... a point where so many of us are immune and the virus has fewer people to infect. Experts theorize (a specific number is not projectable) that perhaps 70 or 80 percent of us have to be immune because we have either received vaccinations, have caught the virus and lived or have caught the virus and died. (Gulp!) As cartoonist Gary Larson would say to the most vulnerable, "Bummer of a birthmark, Hal."

 If you are young and crazy or old and dumb or anywhere in between, the virus doesn't care. As uncle Sam would say if he were this virus, I WANT YOU!

So aside from the virus and the terrible tole it continues to inflict onto us, there is also the loss of landmark restaurants and businesses, the instant militarization of differing ideas and the guns to back them up, the loss of friends and relatives, the disconnect of parents to grown children and grandchildren, the covid-19 way of Christmas, Hanukkah, New Year, Birthday, Wedding, out of school learning, political hate and rancor, etc., etc...

I SOMETIMES FEEL LIKE A FISH OUT OF WATER.

There is no doubt that we can do better as a people. Going back lots and lots of years, my freshman English teacher made us memorize poems we would remember all our lives. So far, so good I guess.

His favorite: There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that it scarcely behoves any of us, to be chatting about the rest of us. (last line to be delivered in double time and with emphasis or I will slap your fingers with my ruler, he said.) A little out of vogue, would you say?

But... as Lena Horn sang in the stage play Showboat (and Ella Fitzgerald, Billy Holiday and Ava Gardner also sang) "Fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly... " then you know there is no room in this world to feel like "... a fish out of water." So world, we've got work to do to get America right again. The most important challenge in the world starts with the first step.

 

I wish you a richer "YOU" in this new year, no matter your race, sex, beliefs and status in the world. You are my brother, sister, them in this world we share.

Saint Francis of Assisi lived in the 12th century yet he helped shape the world we live in today with his love of animals, passion for the environment and commitment to human values. This post, shown as his prayer, is not intended to be religious per/se because that is every human's choice, but a perspective on a path of life that is rich and full of humanity which should be every human's goal.

His values honor the richness of love, respect and empathy with a golden rule perspective, have been rephrased in many ways, but his simple prayer-like statement is perhaps as rich as it gets.

Lord make me an instrument of Thy peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon,

Where there is doubt, faith,

Where there is despair, hope,

Where there is darkness, light,

Where there is sadness, joy.

O divine master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love; for it is giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

May this new year bring peace, love, closeness and an end to this pandemic that has literally and figuratively stolen our very lives. Blessings to you and yours.