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Saturday, April 10, 2010

The face of sports is changing...

Remember when baseball used to be the national pastime? Or football, before we ever heard of... what do you call it... oh, soccer? Well, sorry fanatics, that's not what's hot today. And let's admit it... neither of these were ever an Olympic sport.

Yes, the face of sports is changing... and the world is enthralled. Just a few weeks ago (just four posts down), I brought you the exciting news of the formation of the Professional Alligator Wrestling Association... complete with plans for its own television network... Alligator Wrestlin'... all the Time. And you thought wrestling was fake.

Then comes the news that George Nissen died at age 96. George had springs in his legs. Actually, as you should know, in 1934 he invented the trampoline... God's gift to America's Funniest Videos. An inventive man, he saw his creation become the springboard ;-) of an Olympic sport.

What next will enthrall us, you may ask. Well, the National Breakin' League is re-branding break dancing as the next extreme sport. The League, in existence for four years, sees "top-ranked crews competing in the postseason, culminating in a media-saturated national championship." Move over Super Bowl.

Just think. Olympic medals for alligator wrestling, trampoline jumping and break dancing. Who could resist the appeal? Get rid of the hammer throw (unless you also feature the hammer catch). Besides, it's not even a real hammer. Or fencing, for God's sake... those epees don't even have real points. Who needs hop, skip and jump (without jacks, no less) or dressage where the horse does all the work? Does anyone watch this stuff?

But live alligators or break dancing. Now that's sport. Throw in a few AFV highlights featuring some overweight dad 'crotching' himself on some part of the trampoline and you've got crowd appeal. If Jim McKay were still alive, I can't tell you how excited he would be. I know I can hardly wait to see which country has the guts to claim these gold medals. Hear that Cuba?

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