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Friday, August 13, 2010

Proof: it REALLY IS nuts out there.

At the Sauna World Championships in Finland, the finals required contestants to sit in a 230-degree sauna as water was splashed onto a red-hot stove to increase the heat. (I can cook a roast at 230 degrees.) It all came down to a Russian and a Finn, each trying to outlast the other. Sadly, the Russian collapsed and 1,000 spectators watched as both men, bleeding, burned and shaking, were taken to the hospital. The Russian didn't make it. Sadly, he died 'medium rare."

The 11th annual Sauna World Championships (sport or not sport?) had 130 athletes (?) competing for the grand prize--"some small things."

Move over, Capt. Sullinberger... you remember him... the USAir pilot who miraculously landed his bird-struck jet in the Hudson River last year, saving everyone on board. He was a real American hero. Well, we now have a new media hero "representing everyman," says the press... the Jet Blue flight attendant (I refuse to use his name) who cussed out a passenger over the intercom and deployed an escape chute to leave the plane (with a bottle of beer in his hand) saying he had had enough. How brave he was... to "stiff the man." Well, first class jerk, you suck. Jet Blue is better off without you... and so are the passengers. Who would want to hire this smug crud, let alone worship him?

Using the "don't get mad, get even" credo, 'Mr. Hero", you showed you are worse than your passenger. Your responsibility was to do your job. And you did have a job... which is more than millions of other Americans can say. Don't like your boss... or your responsibilities... quit. And you didn't even do that right. Today's press says you want your job back. The world isn't all roses, stupid. It is filled with jerks like you. American hero? Hope not.

What's in a name? New Jersey residents Deborah and Heath Campbell named their third child, a boy, Adolph Hitler.  Little Adolph and his sibs, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie are in foster care where the state placed them after feeling the Campbells, unemployed and suffering from unspecified physical and psychological disabilities, were unfit parents. A recent appeal by the couple to get their children back was denied because of fears the children would be at risk of serious injury. Don't understand how NJ figured that out.

A North Carolina county must spend an additional $1.1 million to bring its new courthouse up to Americans With Disabilities conformance standards. Seems the bathroom mirrors were hung one inch too high and the toilet bowls were one inch closer to the wall (18" instead of 19") than they should have been. Oh well, what's a million dollars today... virtually nothing.

A burglar now serving 12 years in prison is suing the guy he robbed for $500,000 because, he says, three men knelt on his back and handcuffed him while waiting for police. That, he claims, caused "permanent disabilities and psychological disorders." I guess we should be grateful we live in a country where anyone can sue anyone else for any reason. We should be even more grateful when these kind of cases are thrown out of court.

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