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Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Dumb Crooks & Stupid Sounding Lawsuits

I have always had a love for Dumb Crooks and Stupid Sounding Lawsuits. Thought they represent human nature at its most awry. You often find the best examples in the small print on some back-of-the-paper page, near the bottom...or in some blog, like this one. For example:

A confessed holdup man sued the guy he was holding up for $10,000. Said the victim pulled his own gun, thus endangering his (the crook's) life. Apparently the crook saw this as a "win-win" opportunity. 

Two burglary suspects led police on a 100-mph chase down a Florida interstate. They were finally captured when they stopped at a toll booth to pay 50-cents.

Texas police put out the word that they were looking for a "woman of interest" with a rose tattooed on her left breast. Well, I would guess so... but I think they meant, in relevance to a crime. They got more than they asked for when they received 300 (at last count) calls claiming they knew the woman. Conclusion: Either busy woman or rose-tattooed breasts are big (pun sort-of intended).

Here's one for you: A guy in Kentucky didn't have a nickel for 12-minutes time at a parking meter, so he took a chance anyway. An observant officer, arriving 5-minutes later, cited him for an expired meter, a one-dollar fine. When the officer discovered the parker already owed eight bucks for other parking violations, he had his car towed.
The parker, claiming the officer had no right to have his car towed, sued the city for $150,000 for towing damage to his car. 
The city then counter-sued asking $200,000 in penalties for failure to pay the outstanding eight bucks. 
The officer also sued, asking $350,000 for damage to his reputation.
Finally, the overtime parker sued the officer for $950,000 for the humiliation of having his car towed. 
For the want of a, nickel, the battle was lost...unless you are a lawyer.

And finally,  for now anyhow, a Missouri man, sentenced to spend "the rest of his natural life in prison," sued the state for his release. He claimed the pacemaker that was implanted in his chest, effectively ended his natural life. 


  1. "Dumb Crook" stories are always a favorite of mine. Thanks for the joy of reading a few more!

  2. Since I live in Louisville, Kentucky, this post caught my eye as I scrolled down to your very first post on your one year blogiversary.

    Stupid parking meters. Stupid-er people. Only in Kentucky!